Monday, November 21, 2011

I'm not sure where to start

Mat and I've been talking about adoption for a couple of years, but it was always in the future, it was safe.  We weren't ready to jump in just yet.  In the last year we have talked about it a little more serious, but we didn't think it was the "right" time.  Little by little we have both been convincted.  James 1:27 became very real and personal for us.  "Pure and undefiled religion before our God and Father is this:  to look after orphans and widows in their distress and to keep oneself unstained by the world."  Of course there are numerous ways to "look after orphans", but for us we know that we are supposed to be someone's forever family.

We've spent about 6 months looking at different adoption agencies and praying about which one is right for us.  I found an agency during that time that I would go to their website and look through the waiting children.  I had done that several times, but on Friday, October 28 I saw a new listing.  I clicked on his profile to read about him and felt a tug that I hadn't felt before.  I was convinced that this little boy was supposed to join our family.  We have filled out a pre-application with the agency, but because of a medication that I take we can't begin our home study yet.  I have to be off of it for 6 months before the home study can be approved.  When we found that out I felt like someone had punched me in the stomach.  I was so sure that he was supposed to be ours.  Mat and I continued to pray about him and we felt God tell us that He is in control and his way is always perfect.  We were to be patient.  Now for Mat that's not that hard, but those of you that know me, well that's a post for another day.

About a month before we found his profile I told Mat that I wanted to wean off my medicine.  I have taken an antidepressant/anxiety medicine for a little over 3 years, but I felt like it was time to come off.  He was supportive and we decided to work with my doctor so that I could safely be weaned off of it.  I had no idea at that time that we would be trying to adopt a little boy from a country that will not approve an adoption for someone that is on that kind of medication.  God did.  I have gone from 375mg daily to 75mg daily in about 2 months.  This has only happened because God made it happen.  I give him ALL the glory!  I have always been embarrased because of the medicine and not many people know that I take it.  I felt like I needed to share that here so that someone might see that God can use ordinary, messed up people for His glory!  We aren't "special" or "super holy", we just want to follow God's command.

We humbly ask that you will join us in prayer as we pray for God's guidance throughout this process, for his provision to make this happen, but most of all we pray that He will receive glory and praise.  Please join us in praying for all things while we wait for Isaac Paul.

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